Spending The Holidays Without Your Family: Important Mental Health Considerations

Popular culture often depicts The holiday season with images and videos of family gatherings, laughter, and a shared sense of holiday cheer. However, spending the holidays without family may be a different experience for some. Confronted with societal expectations and loneliness, these individuals may find navigating the festive season difficult.

One might spend the holidays away from their loved ones for various reasons. Circumstances like geographic distance, work commitments, or difficult family relationships may contribute to this decision. In some cases, people may choose to be alone on the holidays for their health and well-being. Regardless of the reason, it's okay to spend time during the holidays differently than how you might see them portrayed in the media. 

In the face of challenges, prioritizing mental health can be crucial. Exploring practical strategies for maintaining mental and emotional well-being during the holiday season may benefit you as you spend this time alone. By understanding and acknowledging your feelings, fostering connections in other ways, and creating your own holiday traditions, it may be possible to navigate this season with grace and resilience. With a shift in perspective, the holidays may become an opportunity for self-care, self-kindness, introspection, and a new perspective on what holiday cheer represents. 

The risks of isolation

Isolation, especially during the holiday season, can pose significant risks to mental health. It may lead to loneliness, which may evolve into chronic conditions like depression or anxiety over time. Individuals spending the holidays alone may encounter heightened sadness and longing in a period often associated with family gatherings and festivities. The absence of the familiar warmth and joy of the holiday season may exacerbate alienation and disconnection.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), isolation is detrimental to health and may be as harmful to longevity as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Additionally, researchers note that chronic isolation and loneliness significantly increase one’s risk of premature mortality, providing further evidence of the foundational benefit of the presence of other humans, especially blood relatives. Science shows that connection and community are essential for human well-being and that humans are social creatures. 

Balance is healthy. It can be vital to balance personal time with community and ensure you are not over-isolating or avoiding confronting the work you achieve in dedicated self-care activities.

Self-care strategies 

Helpful strategies for making the most of the holidays away from family and friends may include the following. 

Volunteering

Volunteering, especially during the Christmas season or around the holidays, may be a fulfilling way to navigate the emotional landscape when one cannot be at the family home. Engaging in altruistic activities, such as helping at a local soup kitchen, contributes not only to the wellness of the community but to your mental health. Volunteering can provide a sense of purpose, reduce loneliness, and foster connections with others, creating a nurturing environment of shared experiences and mutual support. Volunteers are often highly encouraged to apply during busy holidays like Christmas Eve. 

Volunteering may also permit you to celebrate the holidays in your own way while establishing new habits outside of family traditions that can be equally joyous and meaningful. Volunteering underscores that “family” isn't limited to blood relations. Family can extend to the broader community you care about and contribute to. Volunteering can make you an integral part of a community, offering a sense of belonging and bolstering mental health.

Getting involved in your community 

Connecting with friends and the local community may be a powerful mental health buffer during the holiday season. Friends can offer emotional support, providing a listening ear or a shoulder to lean on when times are tough. Engaging in social activities with friends, such as organizing a meal or participating in a holiday-themed event, can imbue a sense of belonging and may combat feelings of isolation.

Meanwhile, the broader community can offer various resources and opportunities for connection. Community centers, religious organizations, and charities in your area may host events during the holiday season intended to bring people together. These gatherings can comfort those passing time alone during this period, fostering a sense of unity and camaraderie. 

In one study, researchers investigated how community involvement and helping affected mental health and well-being. In their research, they found a significant correlation between community helping and overall feelings of well-being. Additionally, they discovered that increased community participation resulted in a reduction in symptoms of anxiety and depression, demonstrating the protective effect that community may have on mental health. 

Reaching out to friends

Having a circle of friends can be a powerful lifeline for mitigating isolation. Friends can offer emotional support and companionship and offer a sense of normalcy and continuity, which may be helpful during the holiday season. Activities with friends or a family member, such as virtual movie nights, gift exchanges, or sharing stories over a phone call or Facetime, may reduce loneliness. The connections you share and the love you give and receive define the holiday spirit, not the physical distance that separates you from others. 

Practicing self-care

Self-care can be paramount during holidays when you may be apart from your family. Self-care encompasses various actions and activities designed to nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. It can be about putting yourself first to ensure your health and happiness aren't compromised. Self-care encompasses any healthy coping mechanism to manage stress, deal with loneliness, and maintain a positive outlook on life.

Engaging in activities you love, whether reading a book, taking a long walk, or cooking your favorite meal, can provide peace and normalcy during otherwise unsettling times. Physical activities like jogging, yoga, or cycling may also enhance your physical and psychological well-being. Meditation and mindfulness can also be potent self-care strategies that may improve your presence, foster a sense of calm, and alleviate stress. 

Maintaining connection in therapy  

You're not alone if you’re experiencing emotional challenges over the holiday season. Talking to a therapist may help you cope with these challenges. However, the holiday season can be busy, and scheduling an in-person appointment may not be possible. In these cases, online therapy with platforms like BetterHelp may be valuable in maintaining mental well-being.

Online therapy offers an accessible platform that provides professional mental health services, allowing individuals to engage in therapeutic guidance from the comfort of their own homes. The convenience and flexibility of online therapy may make it a viable option for those who may be spending holidays away from family, as you can access it from any location with an internet connection. In addition, you can access supportive resources like weekly support groups. 

Online therapy may serve as a viable and efficient alternative to traditional in-person sessions, especially when physical meetings are not feasible. Several studies have substantiated the effectiveness of online-delivered cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), emphasizing its comparable efficacy to conventional face-to-face therapy sessions. Specifically, online-delivered CBT can be a practical, effective, and readily available tool to navigate through these times.

Takeaway

Spending the holidays without family may be difficult, but it can be normal to feel a mix of emotions during this time. Acknowledge your feelings and know you’re not alone in experiencing loneliness and longing. There are numerous ways to stay connected, cultivate joy, and care for your mental well-being. 

For more personalized guidance, it may be helpful to seek professional advice. With a compassionate perspective, you may be better able to transform your holiday experience into one that brings joy to yourself and those around you.